Both said we loved each other and things were good. I cant get him out of my mind. Ashley no matter how you slice it, not responding to you for an entire week was not cool on his part. Feeling ick. When he was leaving, I walked him to his car and he said, I love you. Cut him a break if he has a good reason for ghosting you. And its actually better, because we actually talked. He seemed like a very reasonable, mature guy and it literally seemed perfect He broke up with me by a text message after three years of dating and stopped all communication with me. Almost everyone on this website understands that feeling. I think a new red flag should be if a man tells you something like Im a straight up guy, RUN FOR THE HILLS, because a guy who has to tell you this is not a straight up guy (even if he genuinely thinks he is, he isnt!!! Not as well thought out. The next date was amazing to say the least. Texted literally all day for 3 days and decided to meet. After borrowing money of course. At some point, hell realize how badly he treated you. You're not a priority for him and most likely, never will be. But, where did I go wrong? Wait For Him At The Moment. I think he did want sex and since he didnt get some he decided to go ghost on you. I pulled away. He was gone in a quick whatsapp msg I love you but I want to go it alone, dont want a relationship at the moment, not a dicky bird since, and I was the one taking things slowim still reelingNever heard of Ghosting until now. Then about 2 weeks before the vanishing act he started saying he was feeling really depressed, spending more time alone, but still seeing me atleast twice per week. Everything seemed to be going great with him & even better when he tells you that he likes you but then suddenly, four days later he disappears without even a single text message. At least you can stop wasting your time on him. Man, what is going on with guys? He doesn't care enough about the relationship. Hah . And whats more- when you are willing to settle for less attention or investment than you want, everyone can smell it on you and you become less attractive. Its been an entire night and all day and nothing. Do you accuse him straight away? After a stressed week.. It has now been 6 weeks and I havent heard from him. Dont think so. He on the other hand is no were near these establishments. If there is no chemistry, or timing is not right, just tell her. Early stages meaning you kissed when you first met but other than exchange numbers,no talk of a relationship or anything serious other than he said he likes you. Then you just wont care if this guy you have been dating disappears. His fickelness so early is a bad sign. A guy will disappear without letting you know because he isnt comfortable enough to tell you that he wants to break things off. in other words some women i have dated became less and less someone i could be with the more i got to know them. Move on and meet someone who is. I have no idea what Ive done. (just aint gonna work out girl) I had a really hard time reading your storyI only understood half of it. I got too attached too quickly, demanded too much, and when he didnt deliver, I broke it off. At first i thought he was mad for not leaving work, but i called him asking him to tell me if he was ok. This pain is so deep and Im mad that I shared so much of myself with him. The only reason why I do that is because I feel comfortable with him. Although you might have thought that your personalities matched, you might have been projecting your ideals on him, while also choosing to focus on certain qualities. We kiss and hold hands in public and totally act like a committed couple, it is not like he is not showing his affections towards me. And it wouldnt feel like a big deal at all that he took off for a bit. No goodbye. But if he only ever texts you late at night, it's a red flag. You dont think we know that? Anyways, I texted him the next day apologizing and he responded saying it was not a big deal at all. Second date went well as well. After two first dates with a lively beautiful blond (middle school teacher) I had to let her off the hook. He came and just didnt wanted talk about relationship bcoz I thought it was over and helped him that day and during dinner he just catched up what he was doing for those 2 months and I told him about me. The problem with me is tjah Im not much of clubber or a drinker but I want someone whos not a completely goody two shoes either. Maybe he saw another piece of ass at the store and told himself: Screw that chick, Im hittin this instead! Who the hell knows?! You have only one issue you should be focusing on right now and that is, can I look after this baby on my own or do I even want this baby. He would get very upset if I posted a new profile pic on FB or put a posting on. Also, read my comments above. Gone. We drunk kissed at staff do but straight away we both said to forget it. People make a way to do what they want. He just started to act like he didnt want to do, or plan anything, and wasnt spending enough time with me, so I addressed the issue to him, and first thing he said was I know Im not making you happy so I asked him what was wrong, he said he didnt know, I asked him if he needed some time and he reply yes. He was somewhat possessive however. kick them to the curve! I hope something Ive said helps you out. We were dating 2 months. Ppl pointed things out to me that I didnt even realize I was doing. You have a small window of opportunity abort a child if that child is going to be in an unstable home. Heres a list of what has caused the deterioration of our society and why men are cowards: Coming from this mindset makes it much less of a big deal if a vanisher then vanishes again. He might do the slow fade out, meaning he stops initiating contact and when you reach out to him he takes hours or days to reply. Life is difficult, and then you die. Look, I think people need to know (sorry for the caps, but) THINGS ARENT DEFINABLE. He was perfectly chatty, maybe a little staid? Thanks. Lesson learned. Of course he really didnt have much to say about it, said he just got off work and was tired and didnt need the drama, he actually said it in a nice way! Women flaked on men in their younger years n now they see how it feels. Rabz, Under no circumstance, will you reach out to him, text him, tweet him, call him or have any sort of contact with him..The thing about men, unfortunately is that they love the chase..And they also like confident women who at least seem not to require their reassuranceYou have contacted him enough..Let him get some space, some time to miss your presence..He cannot do it with you constantly reaching out to him..Guys need time to themselves where they can feel like men again..they are not like women who need to close the space, with constant contact..So just let him beTry not to think about himI dont think he was turned off by your looks or personality..But sometimes insecurity can be an attraction killer since the guy feels pressured to reassure the girl over and over again, so it can be a bit draining..so Now you need to step back from your phone, because nothing is going to happen by sitting by and waiting for him to reach out to youHe will come around if he is meant to be with youDont give him anymore importance or time or energyIt is painful when things dont work out, believe me, I have been there over and over againBut losing sight of ourselves is not going to do anything..Yes he is a jerk for losing touch, he is a big jerk for not telling you, but by reaching out to him you are giving him a negative ego boostJust let things run their courseAnd try to open yourself to other guys on that siteI need to take that advice too, though its been difficult to even look at other mens profiles..but you just have to push through your disappointment..By the time he comes around, you will probably have found someone else who respects you for who you are and is not scared off by a few extra textsand you probably wont even want him anymore..so be Kind to yourself, buy yourself a pretty dress, wear some heels, and go out with your friends.You never know, you might meet someone really awesome who will make you forget this guy who you met online.. Thankyiu so much! Feel free to go as crazy as you like in this letter. Around 7 months ago I started talking to an old friend Ive have know since I was 12 (Im 18 now) we were great friends and talked a lot almost every day for a few years. Recently he started talking about marriage, moving in together, etc. As he was driving me home he held my hand and then we kissed good night. Keeping in mind that youre coming from a mindset of love abundance, you want to respond with something like, Having a great week!! We did fall in love and it was great, we spoke on the phone, emailed, chatted on video, and even met after a year. I cried two days straight and moped all 4 days not coming from my room. omg thanks for replying :) Ugh its really sad to think that he just wants sex because in all this years he never tried anything like that (or at least I didnt felt it that way..i dont know). I pretty much begged him to give me closure but he didnt have the balls to do it, so i did. Do nothing. He said he had a great time. As much as Im hurt and sad.the next time I see him, Im gonna tell him to play his games elsewhere..life is to short and I dont have the time. But, Im still not use to it and it worries me every time. Great For: When you need to show him that you're in high demand. You just have to ask yourself a very simple question is this how you want your bf/husband to treat you? I do not take being intimate lightly and I was devastated and very hurt. We had been dating for about 4 mos. 4: Hes just not into me anymore and just poof, vanished because he dont want to hurt me. 2. No amount of excuses or saying that the other girl didnt have this or that will replace the fact that you took the easy way out. Intimacy is THE GLUE in a relationship. Sitting here crying now because dont understand what happened. Please dont waste one more second on a guy who disappears! And he did, but it was like texting my grandma. Thats not going to happen if youre texting him and being in constant contact with him. Although we do share some similar patterns, we are all different given our familial, cultural, and even racial background. Ive been trying to get him to talk to me to explain as I dont know where I stand at all. So much. Cause I tried! I didnt beg or plead or show hurt, I just told him I was confused when I ran into him after that. If the silence precedes, you know better. I still remember what he has told me just know that I will come back, I dont want you to worry that suddenly I wont want to talk to you Its been a month already and where is he now, gone with the wind. If you are still asking why he pursued me then disappeared - this is a likely reason. When you decide to text someone who has disappeared, keep your texts neutral, instead of accusing or angry. Get your head out of the sand, text or call that fool if you really want him back, or dump him now. 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